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Where I rewatch Yugioh GX, Episode 58
Recap of Edo defeating Kaiser Ryou, and now Edo's being swamped by reporters; one lady is all 'wow, that was a great victory', Edo's all 'LOL, I was destined to win', and the reporter asks why Edo used his Hero deck this time. He mentions Judai in a roundabout fashion, says he heard he was on par with the Kaiser, so using his hero deck proves that he's better than Judai, and now he's going to formally challenge Judai to duel him tomorrow at Duel Academia. The stakes? Absolutely nothing. Okay, some it's some bullshit about who's more worthy of using the Hero Deck, which makes this a tired rip-off of Yuugi's duel against Pandora in Battle City.
TITLE SCREEN! VS. EDO (PART 1) E-HEROES VS. E-HEROES more like boredom vs. boredom, amirite?
Blah blah blah, let's ignore that little troll Napoleon, blah blah blah, Judai is all pumped up, and now we're with Mysterious White Robed Man, and seriously, what the fuck kind of room is this anyway? Anyway, Edo walks in, says he can't afford detours, Mysterious White Robed Man responds that the doors of destiny will always be open to him, and asks if he'll be using 'those' cards. Edo says yes, he'll show Judai the 'true' heroes, and I just love all the subtlety here. Blah blah blah, Mysterious White Robed Man wants to take a quick look at Edo's deck, Edo gives it to him, and Mysterious White Robed Guy's eyes start glowing white and dark streamers start coming out of Edo's deck and something is done to it, and honestly I'm not sure what the point of that was. Edo asks about his destiny, other guy says he didn't even need to look, and Edo says he'll be back soon.
Now it is nighttime at the docks, and Chronos and Napoleon are freezing up. Apparently those coats they are wearing are strictly decorative, I'm guessing. And...oh dear God...Jesus Duck-Fucking Christ...this is just so rich...Edo Phoenix freaking SKY-SURFS onto the island! I just...what? What is even the point of this? Were the X-Games still a big deal when this episode came out? I've no idea! And as Edo flies down onto the island like a giant goober, Misawa is looking up information about him; he also does Surfing and Skiing, and he excels at all of them. Also, he has...TWO PHDS??? EDUCATION DOES NOT WORK LIKE THAT YOU STUPID ASS MOTHERFUCKERS! Seriously, there's no point to all this; all those PhDs and trophies don't mean a damn thing, they're just there as part of Edo's resume as a giant Gary Stu. Seriously, what is wrong with these writers? Then Judai rudely yawns, and he does not give a fuck about trying to learn more about his opponent. Because that would be intelligent, and as established by the season 1 finale, being intelligent is BadWrong. Judai says he only cares about having fun and is an annoying little shit, falling asleep on someone else's bed.
And now back to Edo continuing to be a giant goober. Suddenly, glass is breaking and someone is stuffing a bunch of booster packs into a bag! Oh noes, will anyone be able to stop this daring thief? And now Edo is laughing from up above, chiding the thief, and let me guess, he knew he was destined to stop this thief, right? More likely Mysterious White-Robed Guy hired the thief to prop up Edo's reputation even further. Hey, wouldn't that have been a fun twist, if all of Edo's "Destined Victories", were the product of Mysterious White-Robed Guy buying off his opponents? Needless to say, this is not what happens. And now Edo's either got some really fast disguising skills, or that's just some unknown monster he's summoned. Either way, he challenges the thief to a duel. The thief inexplicably accepts, and now we're back to Chronos and Napoleon whining. They see Edo's board drifting by in the water, then there's a huge explosion where the idiot thief is dueling Edo, Edo's won and attacks again anyway. There's a scream, everyone starts running, and Edo's gone through all the cards, saying "How could someone like 'you' be carrying 'that' card?"
So Edo's looking for a particular person, with a particular card. Wow, riveting stuff. And then Edo tosses all the cards onto the thief, who is now twitching. Now everyone's caught up to Edo, they ask a bunch of stupid questions, blah blah blah, Napoleon wants the survival of Osiris Red to be riding on the duel, Edo's all 'fuck you', and then says he'll be waiting for Judai at the Duel Arena first thing in the morning. So, they're not going to duel right now because...? Oh, and he doesn't want a big crowd, this duel isn't anything special to him...which would be why he announced it on National Television, including time and place. Also, where the hell are all the camera crews? You'd figure they'd already be there, getting everything set up. Of course, that would make sense, so...yeah. Judai then contradicts what he said five minutes ago by saying that he won't lose, his Hero deck is everything to him, and Edo just laughs and laughs. Okay, that at least partially redeems him for being a giant goober for no reason earlier. Edo tells Judai to remember his words (fat chance), and walks away.
Now it is daytime, Judai's walking up the steps, his friends are in the audience, and for some reason Junko and Makita are over on the other side to cheer Edo on, because its been five minutes since the last time that this show's had the chance to engage in its heinous gender politics. Asuka gets up to drag them away, but everyone, and I mean everyone, stops her; OH FUCK YOU SHOW! FUCK YOU SO FUCKING HARD! AND FUCK YOU FOR EDITING IN THAT INANE BLUSH! SERIOUSLY, FUCK YOU SO FUCKING MUCH, YOU FUCKING FUCKERS! Seriously, they stop her becuase they think Asuka won't come back, and we're supposed to think they're right. Wow guys, that's a whole lot of respect you have for Asuka there. Excuse me for a moment, I need to go contact the mob about hiring some hit men, it will only take a moment...
Okay, that's been taken care of, so where were we? Oh yes, the mind-numbing sexism. Napoleon announces the start of the duel, Chronos quietly tells Judai to do his best, and some guy dressed in white is talking on a phone with a "Master Saiou". Oh hey, we've got a name for Mysterious White Robed Guy! "Saiou" says that the outcome is decided and soon Judai will become one of them, and to mangle a famous Groucho Marx line, 'I'd never be part of an organization that would have Judai as a member'. Oh, and Saiou gets up, causing his white shawl to fall off, and now his outfit looks very suspiciously like an Obelisk Blue uniform. Very suspiciously. Oh, and Edo will reach new heights. And now we cut to Edo putting his deck into his Duel Disk, and the deck starts letting out more shadowy streamers. I'm guessing that's for the sake of the audience, since no one reacts to it in anyway. Also, we're assuming the audience is comprised of morons who can't remember blatant plot points from five minutes ago. Winged Kuriboh pops out of Judai's deck, blah blah blah, bullshit about Judai showing how much he's grown (he hasn't), and Edo wonders why the fuck Saiou is bothering with this twit for anyway. Blah blah blah, the duel finally begins.
EYECATCH!
Edo goes first and summons Clayman in defense position. And, that's it. Misawa is given a really stupid line, and Judai takes his turn. He plays fusion, noise from the Peanut Gallery, and Judai summons Flame Wingman. He attacks and destroys Clayman for 800 points of damage, and that's the end of his turn. Edo plays, what else, Fusion, and summons Phoenix Guy. Judai does his impression of an adorable autistic puppy but fails to get the adorable part down, and Edo destroys Flame Wingman with Phoenix Guy, who survives thanks to his own effect. Judai says 'not bad', Edo says Judai has no chance of winning, for even though they are both hero-users, there's still a big difference between them. Is it the snappy suit? It's the snappy suit, isn't it? I bet it's the snappy suit! Judai's all WTF, Edo says he'll understand soon enough, which is highly unlikely given that Judai has all the mental capacity of paste, and Edo says it is now Judai's turn. Judai summons Bubbleman, draws two cards with its bullshit effect, and then he plays Warrior's Return, taking back Featherman from his grave. Then he plays Fusion, using Bubbleman, Featherman, and Sparkman to bring out Tempester. Judai attacks, does 700 points of damage, but Phoenix Guy survives. More pointless banter from the peanut gallery, Edo takes his turn and plays another Fusion, combining Phoenix Guy and Sparkman into Shining Phoenix Guy, and since there are five Elemental Heroes in Edo's grave, Shining Phoenix Guy's attack power rises to 4000. Edo attacks and destroys Tempester for 1200 points of damage, and then Edo sets a card to end his turn.
Judai takes his turn, plays Pot of Greed, and now he plays Miracle Fusion, removing Flame Wingman and Sparkman in his grave from play to summon Shining Flare Wingman. And since there are now four Elemental Heroes in Judai's grave, Shining Flare Wingman's attack power becomes 3700. Edo laughs Judai off, saying his Shining Phoenix Guy is still the superior monster, but Judai says he's not done yet. He equips Shining Flare Wingman with Light Eraser, which is basically a Light Saber; now Shining Flame Wingman will remove from play the monsters it battles, getting past Shining Phoenix Guy's immunity to destruction. More noise from the Peanut Gallery, and now Judai activates Skyscraper, which will let Shining Flare Wingman gain 1000 attack points against Shining Phoenix Guy. Judai declares his attack, and Shining Phoenix Guy is removed from play for 700 points of damage.
Judai is just having so much fun, he's never seen such an exciting battle before, except for all the other times he said he's never been so excited before. Edo has had it up to here with Judai, saying that the inevitable battles that heroes find themselves in are never for fun. He asks if Judai has even the slightest fucking clue of the burden of suffering and hatred that a hero has to deal with, and Edo's place in my personal poll skyrockets. It's about damn fucking time someone called Judai out on being such a lazy, unthinking prick. Edo says that people like Judai, who uses Heroes because he thinks that they look cool, make him sick to the stomach, and now he needs them, the true heroes, just in order to survive. Declaring that the Wheel of Destiny has begun to turn, Edo activates his trap card, D-Time; when an Elemental Hero under his control leaves the field, he can add from his deck to his hand D-Heroes whose total levels are equal to or less than the Elemental Hero, so he gets a level four and a level three D-Hero into his hand.
Nobody's ever heard of a D-Hero before, Edo says Judai has no clue of the real power of the Elemental Heroes, the evolution that lies dormant within them, that is the form of the D-Heroes. Destiny, Destroy, Death, they are the D-Heroes who exceed the E-Heroes in every respect. Edo takes his turn and plays the Field Spell Clocktower of Seclusion, which destroys Skyscraper. Edo says something about the hands of destiny, and the hands of the clocktower start to turn, winding back to twelve o clock, and there's that monster that Edo had sicked upon the card thief earlier in the episode, standing on top of the clock tower. Edo calls it D-Hero Devil Guy, and it has 600 attack points. Devil Guy leaps down, everyone's all WTF, Edo explains that this isn't an 'attack', and he declares that he'll activate Devil Guy's effect; Devil Guy jabs Shining Flare Wingman, causing it to vanish, which destroys Light Eraser in the process. Edo explains Devil Guy's effect; once per turn, it can remove from play an opponent's monster, sending it two turns into the future. The ability to manipulate the future, that is the power of the D-series! Edo declares that Judai's destiny has been decided, he laughs, end of episode.
NEXT TIME! The duel continues. EPISODE TITLE, VS. EDO (PART 2) THE D-HEROES OF DESTINY Oh, and we get to see tiny Edo crying. This better be good. And this week's best card is Phoenix Guy, which is total bullshit.
Well, the sexism was painful, the whole alternate E-Hero fusion thing was a complete waste of time, but hey, someone's finally calling Judai out on his bullshit, so this episode isn't completely horrible.
TITLE SCREEN! VS. EDO (PART 1) E-HEROES VS. E-HEROES more like boredom vs. boredom, amirite?
Blah blah blah, let's ignore that little troll Napoleon, blah blah blah, Judai is all pumped up, and now we're with Mysterious White Robed Man, and seriously, what the fuck kind of room is this anyway? Anyway, Edo walks in, says he can't afford detours, Mysterious White Robed Man responds that the doors of destiny will always be open to him, and asks if he'll be using 'those' cards. Edo says yes, he'll show Judai the 'true' heroes, and I just love all the subtlety here. Blah blah blah, Mysterious White Robed Man wants to take a quick look at Edo's deck, Edo gives it to him, and Mysterious White Robed Guy's eyes start glowing white and dark streamers start coming out of Edo's deck and something is done to it, and honestly I'm not sure what the point of that was. Edo asks about his destiny, other guy says he didn't even need to look, and Edo says he'll be back soon.
Now it is nighttime at the docks, and Chronos and Napoleon are freezing up. Apparently those coats they are wearing are strictly decorative, I'm guessing. And...oh dear God...Jesus Duck-Fucking Christ...this is just so rich...Edo Phoenix freaking SKY-SURFS onto the island! I just...what? What is even the point of this? Were the X-Games still a big deal when this episode came out? I've no idea! And as Edo flies down onto the island like a giant goober, Misawa is looking up information about him; he also does Surfing and Skiing, and he excels at all of them. Also, he has...TWO PHDS??? EDUCATION DOES NOT WORK LIKE THAT YOU STUPID ASS MOTHERFUCKERS! Seriously, there's no point to all this; all those PhDs and trophies don't mean a damn thing, they're just there as part of Edo's resume as a giant Gary Stu. Seriously, what is wrong with these writers? Then Judai rudely yawns, and he does not give a fuck about trying to learn more about his opponent. Because that would be intelligent, and as established by the season 1 finale, being intelligent is BadWrong. Judai says he only cares about having fun and is an annoying little shit, falling asleep on someone else's bed.
And now back to Edo continuing to be a giant goober. Suddenly, glass is breaking and someone is stuffing a bunch of booster packs into a bag! Oh noes, will anyone be able to stop this daring thief? And now Edo is laughing from up above, chiding the thief, and let me guess, he knew he was destined to stop this thief, right? More likely Mysterious White-Robed Guy hired the thief to prop up Edo's reputation even further. Hey, wouldn't that have been a fun twist, if all of Edo's "Destined Victories", were the product of Mysterious White-Robed Guy buying off his opponents? Needless to say, this is not what happens. And now Edo's either got some really fast disguising skills, or that's just some unknown monster he's summoned. Either way, he challenges the thief to a duel. The thief inexplicably accepts, and now we're back to Chronos and Napoleon whining. They see Edo's board drifting by in the water, then there's a huge explosion where the idiot thief is dueling Edo, Edo's won and attacks again anyway. There's a scream, everyone starts running, and Edo's gone through all the cards, saying "How could someone like 'you' be carrying 'that' card?"
So Edo's looking for a particular person, with a particular card. Wow, riveting stuff. And then Edo tosses all the cards onto the thief, who is now twitching. Now everyone's caught up to Edo, they ask a bunch of stupid questions, blah blah blah, Napoleon wants the survival of Osiris Red to be riding on the duel, Edo's all 'fuck you', and then says he'll be waiting for Judai at the Duel Arena first thing in the morning. So, they're not going to duel right now because...? Oh, and he doesn't want a big crowd, this duel isn't anything special to him...which would be why he announced it on National Television, including time and place. Also, where the hell are all the camera crews? You'd figure they'd already be there, getting everything set up. Of course, that would make sense, so...yeah. Judai then contradicts what he said five minutes ago by saying that he won't lose, his Hero deck is everything to him, and Edo just laughs and laughs. Okay, that at least partially redeems him for being a giant goober for no reason earlier. Edo tells Judai to remember his words (fat chance), and walks away.
Now it is daytime, Judai's walking up the steps, his friends are in the audience, and for some reason Junko and Makita are over on the other side to cheer Edo on, because its been five minutes since the last time that this show's had the chance to engage in its heinous gender politics. Asuka gets up to drag them away, but everyone, and I mean everyone, stops her; OH FUCK YOU SHOW! FUCK YOU SO FUCKING HARD! AND FUCK YOU FOR EDITING IN THAT INANE BLUSH! SERIOUSLY, FUCK YOU SO FUCKING MUCH, YOU FUCKING FUCKERS! Seriously, they stop her becuase they think Asuka won't come back, and we're supposed to think they're right. Wow guys, that's a whole lot of respect you have for Asuka there. Excuse me for a moment, I need to go contact the mob about hiring some hit men, it will only take a moment...
Okay, that's been taken care of, so where were we? Oh yes, the mind-numbing sexism. Napoleon announces the start of the duel, Chronos quietly tells Judai to do his best, and some guy dressed in white is talking on a phone with a "Master Saiou". Oh hey, we've got a name for Mysterious White Robed Guy! "Saiou" says that the outcome is decided and soon Judai will become one of them, and to mangle a famous Groucho Marx line, 'I'd never be part of an organization that would have Judai as a member'. Oh, and Saiou gets up, causing his white shawl to fall off, and now his outfit looks very suspiciously like an Obelisk Blue uniform. Very suspiciously. Oh, and Edo will reach new heights. And now we cut to Edo putting his deck into his Duel Disk, and the deck starts letting out more shadowy streamers. I'm guessing that's for the sake of the audience, since no one reacts to it in anyway. Also, we're assuming the audience is comprised of morons who can't remember blatant plot points from five minutes ago. Winged Kuriboh pops out of Judai's deck, blah blah blah, bullshit about Judai showing how much he's grown (he hasn't), and Edo wonders why the fuck Saiou is bothering with this twit for anyway. Blah blah blah, the duel finally begins.
EYECATCH!
Edo goes first and summons Clayman in defense position. And, that's it. Misawa is given a really stupid line, and Judai takes his turn. He plays fusion, noise from the Peanut Gallery, and Judai summons Flame Wingman. He attacks and destroys Clayman for 800 points of damage, and that's the end of his turn. Edo plays, what else, Fusion, and summons Phoenix Guy. Judai does his impression of an adorable autistic puppy but fails to get the adorable part down, and Edo destroys Flame Wingman with Phoenix Guy, who survives thanks to his own effect. Judai says 'not bad', Edo says Judai has no chance of winning, for even though they are both hero-users, there's still a big difference between them. Is it the snappy suit? It's the snappy suit, isn't it? I bet it's the snappy suit! Judai's all WTF, Edo says he'll understand soon enough, which is highly unlikely given that Judai has all the mental capacity of paste, and Edo says it is now Judai's turn. Judai summons Bubbleman, draws two cards with its bullshit effect, and then he plays Warrior's Return, taking back Featherman from his grave. Then he plays Fusion, using Bubbleman, Featherman, and Sparkman to bring out Tempester. Judai attacks, does 700 points of damage, but Phoenix Guy survives. More pointless banter from the peanut gallery, Edo takes his turn and plays another Fusion, combining Phoenix Guy and Sparkman into Shining Phoenix Guy, and since there are five Elemental Heroes in Edo's grave, Shining Phoenix Guy's attack power rises to 4000. Edo attacks and destroys Tempester for 1200 points of damage, and then Edo sets a card to end his turn.
Judai takes his turn, plays Pot of Greed, and now he plays Miracle Fusion, removing Flame Wingman and Sparkman in his grave from play to summon Shining Flare Wingman. And since there are now four Elemental Heroes in Judai's grave, Shining Flare Wingman's attack power becomes 3700. Edo laughs Judai off, saying his Shining Phoenix Guy is still the superior monster, but Judai says he's not done yet. He equips Shining Flare Wingman with Light Eraser, which is basically a Light Saber; now Shining Flame Wingman will remove from play the monsters it battles, getting past Shining Phoenix Guy's immunity to destruction. More noise from the Peanut Gallery, and now Judai activates Skyscraper, which will let Shining Flare Wingman gain 1000 attack points against Shining Phoenix Guy. Judai declares his attack, and Shining Phoenix Guy is removed from play for 700 points of damage.
Judai is just having so much fun, he's never seen such an exciting battle before, except for all the other times he said he's never been so excited before. Edo has had it up to here with Judai, saying that the inevitable battles that heroes find themselves in are never for fun. He asks if Judai has even the slightest fucking clue of the burden of suffering and hatred that a hero has to deal with, and Edo's place in my personal poll skyrockets. It's about damn fucking time someone called Judai out on being such a lazy, unthinking prick. Edo says that people like Judai, who uses Heroes because he thinks that they look cool, make him sick to the stomach, and now he needs them, the true heroes, just in order to survive. Declaring that the Wheel of Destiny has begun to turn, Edo activates his trap card, D-Time; when an Elemental Hero under his control leaves the field, he can add from his deck to his hand D-Heroes whose total levels are equal to or less than the Elemental Hero, so he gets a level four and a level three D-Hero into his hand.
Nobody's ever heard of a D-Hero before, Edo says Judai has no clue of the real power of the Elemental Heroes, the evolution that lies dormant within them, that is the form of the D-Heroes. Destiny, Destroy, Death, they are the D-Heroes who exceed the E-Heroes in every respect. Edo takes his turn and plays the Field Spell Clocktower of Seclusion, which destroys Skyscraper. Edo says something about the hands of destiny, and the hands of the clocktower start to turn, winding back to twelve o clock, and there's that monster that Edo had sicked upon the card thief earlier in the episode, standing on top of the clock tower. Edo calls it D-Hero Devil Guy, and it has 600 attack points. Devil Guy leaps down, everyone's all WTF, Edo explains that this isn't an 'attack', and he declares that he'll activate Devil Guy's effect; Devil Guy jabs Shining Flare Wingman, causing it to vanish, which destroys Light Eraser in the process. Edo explains Devil Guy's effect; once per turn, it can remove from play an opponent's monster, sending it two turns into the future. The ability to manipulate the future, that is the power of the D-series! Edo declares that Judai's destiny has been decided, he laughs, end of episode.
NEXT TIME! The duel continues. EPISODE TITLE, VS. EDO (PART 2) THE D-HEROES OF DESTINY Oh, and we get to see tiny Edo crying. This better be good. And this week's best card is Phoenix Guy, which is total bullshit.
Well, the sexism was painful, the whole alternate E-Hero fusion thing was a complete waste of time, but hey, someone's finally calling Judai out on his bullshit, so this episode isn't completely horrible.
no subject
Asuka, kick their asses!
By this point in Battle City, character conflicts and subplots were already being set up. Just something to note.
Edo does win some points for calling Juudai on his incessant excitability. I think Juudai uses the word 'fun' more than Bakura uses 'Ore-sama'. That is not a good thing.
I think I'm too tired to be honestly offended by this episode, though. Yikes. Ah, there, it's back. ASUKA IS NOT A MINDLESS FANGIRL, BOYS, DON'T TREAT HER AS SUCH!
no subject
Grab Shou by his feet and swing him around like a club!
And considering the kind of pacing that Battle City had (not very good), that is just really something.
Yeah, but you know what's going to happen; Edo's going to be converted to the Church of Judai, just like everyone else.
SMASH THEM ASUKA, CRUSH THEM ALL IN A FOUR-AGAINST-ONE DUEL!
no subject
Oh, and finally he'll serve a purpose around here!
Battle City had these weird things called character arcs, it could be what GX is missing. *tongue glued to cheek*
More like a cult. Certainly Asuka, Manjoume, and Misawa want out but can't seem to find out.
*EXTRA-LOUD CHEER FOR ASUKA!*
no subject
A more admirable purpose than he'd ever fulfill on his own at any rate.
But why would there need to be character arcs, when Judai is already perfect to begin with? *sarcastic as all hell*
It's like the labyrinth that the minotaur was trapped in.
*OVER SHADOW THAT POSER OF A DUEL BETWEEN JUDAI AND EDO! YOU CAN DO IT ASUKA!*
no subject
True. Sadly true.
See above re: immovable objects.
Somehow no matter what turn they take, it leads them to another duel involving Juudai and they're forced to get involved. It really stood out in season one's filler how stupid they thought it all.
*makes flags in support of Asuka*
no subject
You know what? I'm going to revoke Shou's glasses. He doesn't deserve them at all.
See above, RE: not wanting to spoil the "surprise"
Indeed, it was really painful how frequent it all was, wasn't it?
*starts petition for Asuka to be made new main character*
no subject
They don't even cover his eyes, I bet he doesn't need them either.
When it's not crack and yet your own cast is criticizing your story, you really should go back to the drawing board.
*signs petition!*
no subject
With lenses like those, I think they're supposed to be for near-sightedness, except we never see him looking through the lenses to look at his cards when he duels...at least, I don't think he does. I'm going to have to check for that the next time Shou duels.
Well, if it is crack, it's the incredibly inept and annoying kind. But they need to get back to the drawing board either way.
*Wakes up from happy dream, goes right back to sleep!*