Where I rewatch Yugioh GX, Episode 29
Jun. 5th, 2010 03:19 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
cypsiman2The full moon is glowing red, that's a good sign. Now we're in a cave somewhere, and in that cave are a bunch of figures standing in the shadows so that we can't see them clearly; possibly some of their designs haven't been finalized, I don't know. And they all have glowing red eyes. You know something? I think these might be the bad guys! The voice of the old man who was talking to Daitokuji two episodes ago says that the Time has come, though as we will learn later 'the time' is pretty much completely arbitrary and he really could have set all this in motion at any point in time. He, engaging in the finest tradition of "As you know, Bob", tells his minions that they've made pact with him to retrieve the 'cards of destiny' for him, and so he wishes to know who will go first. A masked figure steps into the light, and since his mask does not cover anything but his eyes and we've already seen Fubuki's picture back in the abandoned dorm, the writers are clearly on their viewers having a poor memory so that there can be a shocking reveal later on. The Old Man refers to Fubuki as "Darkness" (real clever right there writers. Who's the next guy, Bully? Meany? Jerk? Badwrong?) "Darkness" puts on a Duel Academia issued Duel Disc, which is an anvil sized clue for those two people who haven't already figured out the true identity of "Darkness".
TITLE SCREEN! VS. DARKNESS (PART 1) A CHALLENGE FROM THE RED-EYES BLACK DRAGON seriously, "darkness"? pain was a better villain name then that!
So now the camera is closing in on the volcano, and something flies over it; possibly "Darkness" can transform? Now we're at the lighthouse with Asuka and Kaiser Ryou; the latter notes that Asuka's expression has been getting softer as of late, but Asuka doesn't think so. Ryou calls this a good thing, since Asuka, as a woman, is clearly meant to be soft and warm and a source of comfort for the menfolk while they do all the important shit. Then it starts raining, so the two decide to head back, and I worry about Asuka's health as she walks in that rain while wearing that tiny miniskirt and tight sleeveless shirt. They then pause as they can just barely make out the flying figure against the dark clouds, wondering what it could be. Now we're over at the Principal's office, where he sees the flying figure pass by as the lightning flashes. He says that they've arrived just as he was informed they would...is the leader of this bunch some sort of gentlemen thief? 'cause he certainly seems bent on giving these people plenty of warning so that they can prepare for him. And finally "Darkness" comes to a landing, and its not that he can transform, he just had a hang glider.
Question! What was the point of flying around like that? Aside from showing off that he can use a hang-glider, there was no practical use to that, and it certainly didn't reveal anything interesting about Darkness. Besides which, after he lands, he makes the damn thing spontaneously burst into flames; I would think it a much better demonstration of his 'dark powers' if he were to use them on some random wild animal. Like, I don't know, a dueling monkey perhaps? And as he stands there, we can see that he has the other half of Judai's golden mystical magical medallion, a fact that ultimately raises more questions than it will ever answer. The amulet starts to glow, "Darkness" looks down at Duel Academia, and now we're at the Osiris Red dorm, where Judai is into hour 12 of his 21 daily hours of sleep, thoroughly oblivious to the glowing of his half of the golden mystical magical amulet. Oh, and Shou and Hayato are being kept up by their fear of all the lightning going off all around them. Shou notes that Judai's so calm despite all the thunder, apparently regarding the glowing magic item around his neck as unimportant. Idiot.
And now it is abruptly daytime, and Judai has just gotten done sleeping through yet another class, the lazy fuck; he has a stupid little paper mask on his head to simulate being awake, and I just want to take and use to make so many paper cuts all over his face. He is all excited about getting to eat one of Ms. Tome's handmade box-lunches, but Daitokuji announces that Judai will have to wait on that lunch...FOREVER! No, he and Daitokuji will be heading to the principal's office, hopefully so that Judai can be punished for being the laziest fuck in the history of Duel Academia. Hayato asks if Judai's done something again, Judai is confused by the "again" because he is a moron, and Shou begs Judai to tell him that it's not an expulsion. Oh, and then the shrimp that's been hanging out of Judai's mouth this whole time finally falls out as his crappy-ass paper mask falls over his face, which manages to be a big improvement over his actual face, shockingly enough, as he says that he remembers nothing like that. Manjoume stands up and starts laughing and declares that while it was nice knowing Judai (complete and utter lie), this is goodbye! But Daitokuji says that Manjoume will be coming with them as well, making me wonder if Manjoume will be allowed to punch Judai in the face repeatedly for all the shit he was put through on his account. Oh, and Misawa and Asuka will also be coming along as well. Is everyone going to get a chance to curbstomp Judai's sorry ass?
Judai wonders what's going on, and as they reach the Principal's office they run into Professor Chronos and Kaiser Ryou; Chronos says there must have been a mistake, indicating Judai's presence, and Judai continues to be a repugnant dolt by 'reassuring' Manjoume, and Manjoume yells at him for his rampant and unfunny stupidity. Inside the office, Principal Samejima explains the plot for the rest of the season; The Sangenma, or Mythic Demon Cards, have been sealed beneath the school since Ancient Times, prompting Judai to point out the gaping plot hole of it all, but Manjoume tells him to shut up and let the crazy old man finish the exposition so that they can get on with the plot. Yes, the school was built over where the cards were sealed, and "according to the legend of the island", the world will be enshrouded by evil if the cards are brought to the surface. And yes, these are modern day, cardboard and solidvision chip cards, not giant stone slabs like in the Memory World arc of the original series. Chaos and the darkness within all will be released, destroying the world. Also, while the cards are depicted in shadow, it is obvious that they very strongly resemble the original Egyptian God cards.
Everyone is all shocked that the world might be destroyed, and Judai completely misses the point by a country mile by saying that those cards, the ones that can destroy the entire world, sound pretty awesome. Professor Chronos yells at him, but Judai does not get the savage beating he so richly deserves, and then Samejima continues story-time by saying that people have emerged who desire to break the seals on the Mythic Demon Cards; they are seven duelists known as "The Seven Stars", which I believe is meant to be some sort of reference to the Book of Revelations, but as per this show's standard operating procedure, it is completely meaningless. Oh, and while they are shrouded in mystery, one of them is already on the island. No general alarm will be issued to make sure that no one gets killed by a mad duelist out to destroy the world. Asuka asks how they plan to break the seal, and Samejima says that there are seven stone pillars, the "Spirit Gates" if you will, that provide the actual seal on the cards, and there are seven keys that open the "Spirit Gates".
Why they don't just destroy the keys so that the gates can't ever be opened, never addressed.
Samejima presents the keys to the Seven duelists he summoned to his office, and I think we all know where this is going. Yes, each of them will be entrusted with a key to protect by, of course, dueling. The keys must be won in a duel or else they will not work, once again making me wonder why they don't just bury them somewhere or destroy them, but whatever, flimsy premise is flimsy. Also, this is an edict of the island since Ancient Times. Because that explains everything.
Seriously, where the hell is the island that they're on? Who lived there? Do those people have any connection to that Ancient Egypt Pastiche we ran into the last couple of episodes? How did there power become part of the Duel Monsters that Pegasus created by following the edicts of the Millennium Eye, which was created back in Egypt? Did they use their own version of the Millennium Tome that Akhenaden used to create the Millennium Items? Did they have access to the Millennium Tome, and if so, before or after Akhenaden? These, as well as many other questions, will never be explored, addressed, or answered.
So the seven best duelists of Duel Academia have been called upon, though only five actually qualify as such, two of them were called in to make an odd seven, and Professor Chronos is sure that Judai is one of the sucky duelists that was brought in to meet the mystic bullshit quota. So yeah, the Seven Stars will come to challenge those who protect the keys, and he leaves it to them to decide whether they really want to. Judai is of course the first to accept, since he's probably already forgotten everything that was just said except for the bit where he's been given permission to take one of the shiny things. Everyone grabs one of the keys, and Professor Chronos goes on about how Samejima shouldn't scare the students like that and regards the Seven Stars as nothing more than glorified thieves. Samejima decides to leave him be, and Judai thinks that if he were the Seven Stars, he'd go after the toughest guy first, thoroughly demonstrating that he's no General Patton, and arrogantly declares himself the toughest there. Chronos yells at him, saying that the best is either him or Kaiser Ryou, going on to say that he knows about Judai's duel with Kaiser Ryou and how he got the shit beat out of him, Samejima recaps about how they must be prepared to battle at any time and to protect the seals without fail.
Now its nighttime at the Osiris Red dorm, and Judai's just finished telling Shou and Hayato all about what happened in the previous scene, no doubt inflating his own importance and ego considerably. Hayato says he'd like to be able to see those Three Mythic Demon Cards, and Judai agrees that they must be pretty awesome cards, again apparently forgetting the part where their mere unsealed presence is supposed to destroy everything. And so Judai yawns and will resume his daily 23-hours of sleep. Shou says that if the enemy is going to target the "leader", shouldn't Judai be getting ready, and I so wish I could revoke Judai's main character privileges right the fuck now. Judai says something about wearing a Hachimaki and how he's the number 1 of the whole Duel Academia, and then I shoot him in his smug little face. Some pointless banter involving the use of 'nii-san' and 'aniki' later, and then Judai says a rather revealing line, "they say everything comes to those who wait", which if this is what he really believes, would account for he's such smug, lazy, conceited little prick. And so Judai goes to bed, even though it's only 9:30. What. A. Lazy. Ass. Fuck.
The full moon is still glowing red by the way, and now we see Asuka making her way toward the Osiris Red dorm; she, unlike Judai, has a brain and realizes that the Seven Stars will target the weakest duelists first, and since Judai's in Osiris Red, they'll target him. Clearly the implication is that Asuka is going to try to protect Judai's pathetic ass from his own overinflated ego. Then we see "Darkness" emerge from the trees, and his eyes begin to glow red. Inside the Osiris Red dorm light begins to flood in and Winged Kuriboh tries to wake Judai up. Miraculously the little fuzz-ball succeeds, and Judai eventually notices the strange light filling the room. Which is kind of weird when you think about it; shouldn't "Darkness" be filling the room with, well, darkness? Judai tries to wake up Shou and Hayato, and then his half of the golden mystical magical amulet begins to glow, and he actually wonders what that means. Now we're back outside with Asuka, who upon seeing the strange light spilling out of Judai's room, starts running. She gets in, she and Judai stand there for a bit, and then everything turns white. Again, weird, considering that "Darkness" is supposed to be doing all this.
EYECATCH!
Now we're at the volcano, where a glowing barrier appears above the lave, and Judai and Asuka appear on top of it. A jet of lava shoots out in the shape of a dragon and roars before crashing down onto the barrier, and from the resulting fire, "Darkness" emerges. Okay, that was a pretty decent entrance, all things considered. Judai demands to know who he is, and "Darkness" gives out his name and that he is, in fact, one of the Seven Stars, and that he has chosen Judai as his first opponent, which Judai idiotically takes as confirmation of him being the strongest. "Darkness" looks down at his half of the golden mystical magical amulet, which is glowing, Judai's half starts glowing, and "Darkness" says that the light of the 'pendant' led him to him. But, all he cares about is the key to the Spirit Gate, so he'll take it from Judai in a Duel of Darkness, which has already begun according to him; yes, Shou and Hayato are trapped in a glowing sphere, and while it will protect them from the lava for now, it will fade over time. Thus, the only way to save them is for Judai to win, and win quickly. Judai yells that they've got nothing to do with this, but "Darkness" says not to say such half-hearted things, that they will battle with everything they have on the stage he has set for them. Oh, and the loser will have their soul sealed into a card, ala Pegasus sealing Mokuba and Seto into cards during Duelist Kingdom. Thus, their very lives are at stake, and this is the Duel of Darkness that "Darkness" uses.
Asuka, by the way, despite being able to see and hear "Darkness" for some time now, still hasn't figured out that "Darkness" is really her big brother Fubuki. It's like Tuxedo Mask and Racer X; no one's fooled, and we have nothing but contempt for the characters who can't figure it out despite the obviousness of it all. Asuka instead asks if this is real, I roll my eyes, and Judai says he's been in this sort of duel before, insert flashbacks of Psycho Shocker and Gravekeeper Chief here, and Judai still hasn't formed any sort of connection to the fact that this means that Titan was, in fact, eaten by slime demons and dragged down into Hell. Moron. Judai yells out that he can't lose, the Peanut Gallery calls out his name, and so the duel finally begins.
"Darkness" takes the first turn, and summons Army Dragon, AKA Troop Dragon, in defense position. Then he sets a card to end his turn. Judai summons Wildman and attacks Army Dragon, destroying it and activating its effect, allowing "Darkness" to special summon another one from his deck. Judai ends his turn, and so "Darkness" activates his trap card, Call of the Living Dead, bringing back the original Army Dragon. Then, he sacrifices both monsters to summon out Red-Eyes Black Dragon, and I have to guess that this isn't Fubuki's original deck, or else Asuka's been fed an extra-concentrated double dosage of stupid-pills, as she still hasn't figured out who "Darkness" really is. As Red-Eyes emerges from the lava, Hayato stupidly tests the barrier that is keeping them safe, and almost falls out as a gap appears in it. "Darkness" then has the Red-Eyes attack Wildman for 900 points of damage, the impact of which causes Judai to slide back towards Asuka. She says his name, practicing her "Hueco-Mundo-Arc Orihime" impression, and Judai grips his chest in pain. "Darkness" reminds him that their lives and souls are on the line, Judai forces himself back up, Asuka says "Judai" twice in the span of a minute, and Judai proclaims his confidence in his strength. Dude, we've seen you without your shirt on, and you are a scrawny little kid.
So Judai draws Fusion and plays it, summoning Rampart Gunner in defense position and then attacking directly for 1000 points of damage. Judai proclaims that with Rampart Gunner (2500 defense) he'll be safe from Red-Eyes Black Dragon (2400 attack). Judai then notices that "Darkness" was injured by his attack, but "Darkness" quickly ignores it and takes his turn, declaring that their pain shall become a sacrifice to the dragons, taking them to a higher stage! After that bit of pretentiousness, which Judai comments on, he plays Dark Mega Flare, which allows him to deal damage equal to Red-Eyes original attack power to Judai, but he isn't allowed to attack with Red-Eyes on the same turn. Then he summons Attachment Dragon and equips it to Rampart Gunner, using its effect to switch Rampart Gunner to attack position; thus, Judai won't be able to do direct attacks next turn.
Quite frankly, this was a stupid play on the part of "Darkness"; he should have summoned Attachment Dragon first, used it to switch Rampart Gunner to attack position, and then attack with Red-Eyes to destroy Rampart Gunner for 400 points of damage, saving Dark Mega Flare for when it would do enough damage to win the game. Field control, field presence, destroying and getting rid of your opponent's cards, is far, far more important then doing damage. As any real duelist would be able to tell you, the only life point that matters is the last one.
"Darkness" ends his turn, the Peanut Gallery calls out Judai's name, and Shou and Hayato almost fall to their fiery deaths as the barrier continues to dissolve. Judai calls out his turn and engages in what is, by far, the single most dramatic card draw in the entire series as Judai tries to look all badass, failing miserably due to the singular fact that he is Judai and no matter what accomplishments or accolades or power-ups or special destinies that the writers may pile onto Judai, he will always be made of fail. And so the episode ends.
NEXT TIME! Everyone else who has a key stands around significantly, the duel continues, Judai violates my very being by saying he's having such a fun duel, EPISODE TITLE, VS. DARKNESS (PART 2) AN ATTACK FROM THE RED-EYES DARKNESS DRAGON and Shou tries to act like the reveal of the true identity of "Darkness" will be some sort of shock. It isn't.
Well, we get a whole horde of McGuffins and a bunch of villains who're after them. Will the villains be a match for Malik's 'Ghouls'? Or even the motorcycle riding losers from DOMA? Will this inane plotline ever add up or make any sense? For more disappointing non-answers, stay tuned for the next episode.
TITLE SCREEN! VS. DARKNESS (PART 1) A CHALLENGE FROM THE RED-EYES BLACK DRAGON seriously, "darkness"? pain was a better villain name then that!
So now the camera is closing in on the volcano, and something flies over it; possibly "Darkness" can transform? Now we're at the lighthouse with Asuka and Kaiser Ryou; the latter notes that Asuka's expression has been getting softer as of late, but Asuka doesn't think so. Ryou calls this a good thing, since Asuka, as a woman, is clearly meant to be soft and warm and a source of comfort for the menfolk while they do all the important shit. Then it starts raining, so the two decide to head back, and I worry about Asuka's health as she walks in that rain while wearing that tiny miniskirt and tight sleeveless shirt. They then pause as they can just barely make out the flying figure against the dark clouds, wondering what it could be. Now we're over at the Principal's office, where he sees the flying figure pass by as the lightning flashes. He says that they've arrived just as he was informed they would...is the leader of this bunch some sort of gentlemen thief? 'cause he certainly seems bent on giving these people plenty of warning so that they can prepare for him. And finally "Darkness" comes to a landing, and its not that he can transform, he just had a hang glider.
Question! What was the point of flying around like that? Aside from showing off that he can use a hang-glider, there was no practical use to that, and it certainly didn't reveal anything interesting about Darkness. Besides which, after he lands, he makes the damn thing spontaneously burst into flames; I would think it a much better demonstration of his 'dark powers' if he were to use them on some random wild animal. Like, I don't know, a dueling monkey perhaps? And as he stands there, we can see that he has the other half of Judai's golden mystical magical medallion, a fact that ultimately raises more questions than it will ever answer. The amulet starts to glow, "Darkness" looks down at Duel Academia, and now we're at the Osiris Red dorm, where Judai is into hour 12 of his 21 daily hours of sleep, thoroughly oblivious to the glowing of his half of the golden mystical magical amulet. Oh, and Shou and Hayato are being kept up by their fear of all the lightning going off all around them. Shou notes that Judai's so calm despite all the thunder, apparently regarding the glowing magic item around his neck as unimportant. Idiot.
And now it is abruptly daytime, and Judai has just gotten done sleeping through yet another class, the lazy fuck; he has a stupid little paper mask on his head to simulate being awake, and I just want to take and use to make so many paper cuts all over his face. He is all excited about getting to eat one of Ms. Tome's handmade box-lunches, but Daitokuji announces that Judai will have to wait on that lunch...FOREVER! No, he and Daitokuji will be heading to the principal's office, hopefully so that Judai can be punished for being the laziest fuck in the history of Duel Academia. Hayato asks if Judai's done something again, Judai is confused by the "again" because he is a moron, and Shou begs Judai to tell him that it's not an expulsion. Oh, and then the shrimp that's been hanging out of Judai's mouth this whole time finally falls out as his crappy-ass paper mask falls over his face, which manages to be a big improvement over his actual face, shockingly enough, as he says that he remembers nothing like that. Manjoume stands up and starts laughing and declares that while it was nice knowing Judai (complete and utter lie), this is goodbye! But Daitokuji says that Manjoume will be coming with them as well, making me wonder if Manjoume will be allowed to punch Judai in the face repeatedly for all the shit he was put through on his account. Oh, and Misawa and Asuka will also be coming along as well. Is everyone going to get a chance to curbstomp Judai's sorry ass?
Judai wonders what's going on, and as they reach the Principal's office they run into Professor Chronos and Kaiser Ryou; Chronos says there must have been a mistake, indicating Judai's presence, and Judai continues to be a repugnant dolt by 'reassuring' Manjoume, and Manjoume yells at him for his rampant and unfunny stupidity. Inside the office, Principal Samejima explains the plot for the rest of the season; The Sangenma, or Mythic Demon Cards, have been sealed beneath the school since Ancient Times, prompting Judai to point out the gaping plot hole of it all, but Manjoume tells him to shut up and let the crazy old man finish the exposition so that they can get on with the plot. Yes, the school was built over where the cards were sealed, and "according to the legend of the island", the world will be enshrouded by evil if the cards are brought to the surface. And yes, these are modern day, cardboard and solidvision chip cards, not giant stone slabs like in the Memory World arc of the original series. Chaos and the darkness within all will be released, destroying the world. Also, while the cards are depicted in shadow, it is obvious that they very strongly resemble the original Egyptian God cards.
Everyone is all shocked that the world might be destroyed, and Judai completely misses the point by a country mile by saying that those cards, the ones that can destroy the entire world, sound pretty awesome. Professor Chronos yells at him, but Judai does not get the savage beating he so richly deserves, and then Samejima continues story-time by saying that people have emerged who desire to break the seals on the Mythic Demon Cards; they are seven duelists known as "The Seven Stars", which I believe is meant to be some sort of reference to the Book of Revelations, but as per this show's standard operating procedure, it is completely meaningless. Oh, and while they are shrouded in mystery, one of them is already on the island. No general alarm will be issued to make sure that no one gets killed by a mad duelist out to destroy the world. Asuka asks how they plan to break the seal, and Samejima says that there are seven stone pillars, the "Spirit Gates" if you will, that provide the actual seal on the cards, and there are seven keys that open the "Spirit Gates".
Why they don't just destroy the keys so that the gates can't ever be opened, never addressed.
Samejima presents the keys to the Seven duelists he summoned to his office, and I think we all know where this is going. Yes, each of them will be entrusted with a key to protect by, of course, dueling. The keys must be won in a duel or else they will not work, once again making me wonder why they don't just bury them somewhere or destroy them, but whatever, flimsy premise is flimsy. Also, this is an edict of the island since Ancient Times. Because that explains everything.
Seriously, where the hell is the island that they're on? Who lived there? Do those people have any connection to that Ancient Egypt Pastiche we ran into the last couple of episodes? How did there power become part of the Duel Monsters that Pegasus created by following the edicts of the Millennium Eye, which was created back in Egypt? Did they use their own version of the Millennium Tome that Akhenaden used to create the Millennium Items? Did they have access to the Millennium Tome, and if so, before or after Akhenaden? These, as well as many other questions, will never be explored, addressed, or answered.
So the seven best duelists of Duel Academia have been called upon, though only five actually qualify as such, two of them were called in to make an odd seven, and Professor Chronos is sure that Judai is one of the sucky duelists that was brought in to meet the mystic bullshit quota. So yeah, the Seven Stars will come to challenge those who protect the keys, and he leaves it to them to decide whether they really want to. Judai is of course the first to accept, since he's probably already forgotten everything that was just said except for the bit where he's been given permission to take one of the shiny things. Everyone grabs one of the keys, and Professor Chronos goes on about how Samejima shouldn't scare the students like that and regards the Seven Stars as nothing more than glorified thieves. Samejima decides to leave him be, and Judai thinks that if he were the Seven Stars, he'd go after the toughest guy first, thoroughly demonstrating that he's no General Patton, and arrogantly declares himself the toughest there. Chronos yells at him, saying that the best is either him or Kaiser Ryou, going on to say that he knows about Judai's duel with Kaiser Ryou and how he got the shit beat out of him, Samejima recaps about how they must be prepared to battle at any time and to protect the seals without fail.
Now its nighttime at the Osiris Red dorm, and Judai's just finished telling Shou and Hayato all about what happened in the previous scene, no doubt inflating his own importance and ego considerably. Hayato says he'd like to be able to see those Three Mythic Demon Cards, and Judai agrees that they must be pretty awesome cards, again apparently forgetting the part where their mere unsealed presence is supposed to destroy everything. And so Judai yawns and will resume his daily 23-hours of sleep. Shou says that if the enemy is going to target the "leader", shouldn't Judai be getting ready, and I so wish I could revoke Judai's main character privileges right the fuck now. Judai says something about wearing a Hachimaki and how he's the number 1 of the whole Duel Academia, and then I shoot him in his smug little face. Some pointless banter involving the use of 'nii-san' and 'aniki' later, and then Judai says a rather revealing line, "they say everything comes to those who wait", which if this is what he really believes, would account for he's such smug, lazy, conceited little prick. And so Judai goes to bed, even though it's only 9:30. What. A. Lazy. Ass. Fuck.
The full moon is still glowing red by the way, and now we see Asuka making her way toward the Osiris Red dorm; she, unlike Judai, has a brain and realizes that the Seven Stars will target the weakest duelists first, and since Judai's in Osiris Red, they'll target him. Clearly the implication is that Asuka is going to try to protect Judai's pathetic ass from his own overinflated ego. Then we see "Darkness" emerge from the trees, and his eyes begin to glow red. Inside the Osiris Red dorm light begins to flood in and Winged Kuriboh tries to wake Judai up. Miraculously the little fuzz-ball succeeds, and Judai eventually notices the strange light filling the room. Which is kind of weird when you think about it; shouldn't "Darkness" be filling the room with, well, darkness? Judai tries to wake up Shou and Hayato, and then his half of the golden mystical magical amulet begins to glow, and he actually wonders what that means. Now we're back outside with Asuka, who upon seeing the strange light spilling out of Judai's room, starts running. She gets in, she and Judai stand there for a bit, and then everything turns white. Again, weird, considering that "Darkness" is supposed to be doing all this.
EYECATCH!
Now we're at the volcano, where a glowing barrier appears above the lave, and Judai and Asuka appear on top of it. A jet of lava shoots out in the shape of a dragon and roars before crashing down onto the barrier, and from the resulting fire, "Darkness" emerges. Okay, that was a pretty decent entrance, all things considered. Judai demands to know who he is, and "Darkness" gives out his name and that he is, in fact, one of the Seven Stars, and that he has chosen Judai as his first opponent, which Judai idiotically takes as confirmation of him being the strongest. "Darkness" looks down at his half of the golden mystical magical amulet, which is glowing, Judai's half starts glowing, and "Darkness" says that the light of the 'pendant' led him to him. But, all he cares about is the key to the Spirit Gate, so he'll take it from Judai in a Duel of Darkness, which has already begun according to him; yes, Shou and Hayato are trapped in a glowing sphere, and while it will protect them from the lava for now, it will fade over time. Thus, the only way to save them is for Judai to win, and win quickly. Judai yells that they've got nothing to do with this, but "Darkness" says not to say such half-hearted things, that they will battle with everything they have on the stage he has set for them. Oh, and the loser will have their soul sealed into a card, ala Pegasus sealing Mokuba and Seto into cards during Duelist Kingdom. Thus, their very lives are at stake, and this is the Duel of Darkness that "Darkness" uses.
Asuka, by the way, despite being able to see and hear "Darkness" for some time now, still hasn't figured out that "Darkness" is really her big brother Fubuki. It's like Tuxedo Mask and Racer X; no one's fooled, and we have nothing but contempt for the characters who can't figure it out despite the obviousness of it all. Asuka instead asks if this is real, I roll my eyes, and Judai says he's been in this sort of duel before, insert flashbacks of Psycho Shocker and Gravekeeper Chief here, and Judai still hasn't formed any sort of connection to the fact that this means that Titan was, in fact, eaten by slime demons and dragged down into Hell. Moron. Judai yells out that he can't lose, the Peanut Gallery calls out his name, and so the duel finally begins.
"Darkness" takes the first turn, and summons Army Dragon, AKA Troop Dragon, in defense position. Then he sets a card to end his turn. Judai summons Wildman and attacks Army Dragon, destroying it and activating its effect, allowing "Darkness" to special summon another one from his deck. Judai ends his turn, and so "Darkness" activates his trap card, Call of the Living Dead, bringing back the original Army Dragon. Then, he sacrifices both monsters to summon out Red-Eyes Black Dragon, and I have to guess that this isn't Fubuki's original deck, or else Asuka's been fed an extra-concentrated double dosage of stupid-pills, as she still hasn't figured out who "Darkness" really is. As Red-Eyes emerges from the lava, Hayato stupidly tests the barrier that is keeping them safe, and almost falls out as a gap appears in it. "Darkness" then has the Red-Eyes attack Wildman for 900 points of damage, the impact of which causes Judai to slide back towards Asuka. She says his name, practicing her "Hueco-Mundo-Arc Orihime" impression, and Judai grips his chest in pain. "Darkness" reminds him that their lives and souls are on the line, Judai forces himself back up, Asuka says "Judai" twice in the span of a minute, and Judai proclaims his confidence in his strength. Dude, we've seen you without your shirt on, and you are a scrawny little kid.
So Judai draws Fusion and plays it, summoning Rampart Gunner in defense position and then attacking directly for 1000 points of damage. Judai proclaims that with Rampart Gunner (2500 defense) he'll be safe from Red-Eyes Black Dragon (2400 attack). Judai then notices that "Darkness" was injured by his attack, but "Darkness" quickly ignores it and takes his turn, declaring that their pain shall become a sacrifice to the dragons, taking them to a higher stage! After that bit of pretentiousness, which Judai comments on, he plays Dark Mega Flare, which allows him to deal damage equal to Red-Eyes original attack power to Judai, but he isn't allowed to attack with Red-Eyes on the same turn. Then he summons Attachment Dragon and equips it to Rampart Gunner, using its effect to switch Rampart Gunner to attack position; thus, Judai won't be able to do direct attacks next turn.
Quite frankly, this was a stupid play on the part of "Darkness"; he should have summoned Attachment Dragon first, used it to switch Rampart Gunner to attack position, and then attack with Red-Eyes to destroy Rampart Gunner for 400 points of damage, saving Dark Mega Flare for when it would do enough damage to win the game. Field control, field presence, destroying and getting rid of your opponent's cards, is far, far more important then doing damage. As any real duelist would be able to tell you, the only life point that matters is the last one.
"Darkness" ends his turn, the Peanut Gallery calls out Judai's name, and Shou and Hayato almost fall to their fiery deaths as the barrier continues to dissolve. Judai calls out his turn and engages in what is, by far, the single most dramatic card draw in the entire series as Judai tries to look all badass, failing miserably due to the singular fact that he is Judai and no matter what accomplishments or accolades or power-ups or special destinies that the writers may pile onto Judai, he will always be made of fail. And so the episode ends.
NEXT TIME! Everyone else who has a key stands around significantly, the duel continues, Judai violates my very being by saying he's having such a fun duel, EPISODE TITLE, VS. DARKNESS (PART 2) AN ATTACK FROM THE RED-EYES DARKNESS DRAGON and Shou tries to act like the reveal of the true identity of "Darkness" will be some sort of shock. It isn't.
Well, we get a whole horde of McGuffins and a bunch of villains who're after them. Will the villains be a match for Malik's 'Ghouls'? Or even the motorcycle riding losers from DOMA? Will this inane plotline ever add up or make any sense? For more disappointing non-answers, stay tuned for the next episode.
