Where I rewatch Yugioh GX, Episode 79
Sep. 29th, 2010 02:10 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
cypsiman2Ho hum, still no subs, hey, what are you going to do? Also, boring and pointless recap is boring and pointless.
TITLE SCREEN! THE GREATEST TAG! JUDAI & EDO! (PART 2) nope, this isn't even a match for yuugi and seto's tag duel.
Seriously? We're actually going to spend time on Shou and Kenzan? Those are some awesome priorities you've got there, I tell you what. Mizuchi One's turn, she draws a big monster, and sacrifices her monsters to summon...Dark God. I'm dead fucking serious, that is its actual name, 'Yami no Kami, Dark God'. How creatively void do you have to be in order to think of that as an acceptable name for a card. I mean...I'm sorry, I appear to have lost my train of thought. I imagine that has something to do with Dark God's striking resemblance to a vagina. I'm going to let that stand on its own, and never bring it up again. Oh, and now she activates the effect of her Full Moon card to activate Magic Mirror of Endless Summons, which lets her special summon 9 Dark God Tokens to the field, each with the same stats and effect as the Dark God itself. Shou and Kenzan whine that all is lost, blah blah blah, Mizuchi declares her attack, and Edo activates his trap card Elemental Recharge, allowing him and Judai to regain 3000 life points thanks to Judai's three Elemental Heroes on the field. Of course, why Edo would have had that card in his deck considering he doesn't use Elemental Heroes anymore, I've no idea. All three of Judai's monsters are destroyed for massive damage, and it turns out that when Dark God destroys a monster, the opponent takes another 700 damage, so that leaves Judai and Edo with just 1600 life points. Now all that's left is for Mizuchi to attack directly...except that she doesn't, she just sets a card to end her turn.
For once, logic reigns and everyone is confused. Yes, it turns out that the Dark God can't attack directly...which makes summoning all of those tokens really stupid, it would have made far more sense for Mizuchi's card to have given Dark God the ability to attack all of the opponent's monsters once each. Say, you don't suppose that this will result in a ludicrously contrived way for Judai to win, do you? Ha ha ha, perish the thought, a contrived win for Judai? Never! Judai's turn, he draws Neos, but what a shame, he can't summon him this turn, making this a dead draw. Blah blah blah, Judai and Edo realize that there's no point in summoning weak monsters, since Dark God can't attack directly. Also, Judai's voice is still really annoying. Judai ends his turn without doing anything, and Mizuchi mocks his efforts to try and exploit Dark God's limitations. So she activates her permanent trap card Shikigami Return; during the end phase of your opponent's turn, if they did not summon a monster, special summon a Shikigami token to their side of the field in defense position. Mizuchi attacks, boom goes Shikigami, and now Judai and Edo are down to 900 life points.
Oh dear god Judai, I want to punch you so fucking much I'll tear open a hole into the punch dimension to do so. WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU JUDAI, HAVE YOU NO FUCKING CONCEPT OF WHAT IS AT STAKE HERE? HAVE YOU NO FUCKING CONCEPT THAT YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE SAVING YOUR FRIENDS, NOT GAWKING AT STUPID MONSTERS? NO, OF COURSE YOU DON'T, BECAUSE THAT WOULDN'T BE FUN, NOW WOULD IT YOU PRICK! Honestly, there is a world of difference between keeping a positive attitude, and being a fucking prick. Judai, is a fucking prick.
Blah blah blah, WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU PLAYING THAT TRACK, IT DOESN'T EVEN MAKE THE LEAST BIT OF SENSE YOU TWITS! AND THEY STRETCH IT OUT, OH DEAR GOD WHEN IS IT GOING TO END? Oh, and Edo special summons two Double Guy tokens, thanks to Double Guy's effect. Blah blah blah, Edo is obsessed with his D-Heroes, and then he sacrifices one of the tokens to summon Dash Guy, whose effect allows him to sacrifice the other token to increase its attack power by 1000, to 3100, 100 greater than the Dark God. Judai points out the obvious, Edo attacks, huge boom, Mizuchi takes 100 damage, but as it turns out, Dark God can't be destroyed in battle. And after the battle phase is over, Dash Guy switches to defense position. Edo ends his turn and is convinced that they're destined to lose, and Dash Guy is destroyed for 700 damage, which means that if Judai doesn't win on his next turn, they lose. Blah blah blah, Judai is so great, we fucking get it, and suddenly Winged Kuriboh comes out. It points to Edo, and...Dash Guy is standing next to him? Does Judai really need a spirit's help to remember that Dash Guy was on the field last turn? Fuck, I don't even know anymore. Blah blah blah, everyone's depending on Judai, which in a sane universe would mean everyone's fucked, but this is GX.
EYECATCH!
Judai's turn, and he's drawn the sixth and final Hippy Space Animal, Black Panther. Really? Black Panther? You're really going to go there? Also, it apparently feels the need to spell out to Judai how to win. Fuck, fuck, fuck. Anyway, it turns out that when Dash Guy is in the grave, once per duel you can special summon a monster you've just drawn, so he special summons Black Panther onto the field. Then he activates Black Panther's effect; once per turn he can copy another monster's name and effect until the end phase, so he copies Dark God's name and effect, which conveniently enough allows Judai to use the Mirror Summoning card to special summon a whole mess of tokens onto the field. Wow, so that's the contrivance that the writers were going for; I knew they could do something incredibly epically stupid.
Seriously, compare this, to Yuugi exploiting the loophole in Malik's infinite-card combo in his duel against the Silent Puppet, there is a huge world of difference between them. Anyway, Judai sacrifices two of the tokens to summon Neos, and then does Contact Fusion to bring out Black Neos; if he starts talking in a Jive Turkey accent, I'm leaving. And what is Black Neos's effect? Why, Judai picks a monster on the field, and negates its effect, how quaint. So Judai sicks one of his Dark God Tokens after the original, they both blow up, and apparently this takes out all the other tokens. Then Judai attacks directly with Black Neos, winning the duel. Woo. Oh, and now Shou and Kenzan are back to normal. Woop-di-do.
Blah blah blah, for the fifty millionth time Judai is so great, blah blah blah, and now Mizuchi asks that Judai and Edo save her brother; yes, that's right, we're just going to straight up rip-off of Battle City and Isis Ishtar, instead risking doing something vaguely interesting. Okay, there's just a lot of talking here, so I'm just going to go off the summary; Takuma is two-faced and wants to destroy the world. When they were young, their ability to see the future drove people away from them for...some reason, and this gave them a super-special awesome brother-sister bond unlike any other...UNTIL ONE DAY! A duelist arrived, wanting his fortune told, and he showed Takuma a card. The card, by the way, is glowing bright white, and I'm not sure if this is to represent that Mizuchi didn't get a good look at it, or if its meant to be taken literally; I certainly wouldn't put it past this show for it to be taken literally. Mizuchi tried to get Takuma to get rid of the card, but no dice. Also, it was apparently a Hero card, though how Mizuchi can remember that but not the actual name of a card, is just one plot hole out of a million. This of course gets Edo's attention, as it means that Saiou had to have known all along the identity of the man who murdered Edo's father. Edo demands to know where Saiou's keeping the card, but according to Mizuchi, it went missing some time ago. BECAUSE THAT MAKES SENSE!!!
Oh, and it would seem that Mizuchi was a load bearing boss, because the whole virtual reality place is collapsing for no particular reason. Blah blah blah, Mizuchi will be staying behind, as apparently at some point she bonded her soul to the computer or some shit like that, I don't even know anymore, and she begs Judai and Edo to stop her brother from destroying the world. They accept, and they leave. They're back outside, and Shou is such a rude fucking prick to Misawa that I honestly wish he'd been left behind. Oh, and apparently the four elemental idiots are also okay. Whatever, it's not like anyone in the audience or the writing staff gave a fuck about them. Blah blah blah, Sugoroku says something about Seto saving Mizuchi, and so the idiot patrol takes off. Oh, also at some point Sugoroku got his bandanna back.
Saiou is wondering why Mizuchi hasn't contacted him yet about who's supposed to change his destiny, and then he sees Judai and Edo pass him by on the road, which for some reason makes him really mad. I honestly do not understand, if Mizuchi was supposed to test those twits, why would he be surprised about them being alive and well? But hey, none of this plot ever made sense to begin with, so why should it start now. And now Saiou is glowing, and is saying bad things about Judai and Edo. Woo. Oh hey, end of episode.
NEXT TIME! Instead of going after Saiou, Judai instead duels a walking Alice-in-Wonderland reference. Because he is an idiot. EPISODE TITLE, ALICE OF DESPERATE LAND. Card of the Week is Dark God.
Now, a few words about the context of this entire, insipid mini-arc. See, originally, it was going to be a movie! Kazuki Takahashi had the notion for Judai and the others to go to Domino City and meet up with Yuugi and the others, and Saiou would have just been a student with a Tarot themed deck. Obviously, that fell through, but this crop of writers felt just fine about cannibalizing this movie idea to create this mini-arc. And the other thing to bring up, is that the reason why Demiurge Ema and Dark God looked so stupid and out of place, was because they were winners of some stupid create-a-card contest, and so they got shoved in to the show. So there you go, the backstory to why the past five episodes were an even bigger waste of time than usual.
TITLE SCREEN! THE GREATEST TAG! JUDAI & EDO! (PART 2) nope, this isn't even a match for yuugi and seto's tag duel.
Seriously? We're actually going to spend time on Shou and Kenzan? Those are some awesome priorities you've got there, I tell you what. Mizuchi One's turn, she draws a big monster, and sacrifices her monsters to summon...Dark God. I'm dead fucking serious, that is its actual name, 'Yami no Kami, Dark God'. How creatively void do you have to be in order to think of that as an acceptable name for a card. I mean...I'm sorry, I appear to have lost my train of thought. I imagine that has something to do with Dark God's striking resemblance to a vagina. I'm going to let that stand on its own, and never bring it up again. Oh, and now she activates the effect of her Full Moon card to activate Magic Mirror of Endless Summons, which lets her special summon 9 Dark God Tokens to the field, each with the same stats and effect as the Dark God itself. Shou and Kenzan whine that all is lost, blah blah blah, Mizuchi declares her attack, and Edo activates his trap card Elemental Recharge, allowing him and Judai to regain 3000 life points thanks to Judai's three Elemental Heroes on the field. Of course, why Edo would have had that card in his deck considering he doesn't use Elemental Heroes anymore, I've no idea. All three of Judai's monsters are destroyed for massive damage, and it turns out that when Dark God destroys a monster, the opponent takes another 700 damage, so that leaves Judai and Edo with just 1600 life points. Now all that's left is for Mizuchi to attack directly...except that she doesn't, she just sets a card to end her turn.
For once, logic reigns and everyone is confused. Yes, it turns out that the Dark God can't attack directly...which makes summoning all of those tokens really stupid, it would have made far more sense for Mizuchi's card to have given Dark God the ability to attack all of the opponent's monsters once each. Say, you don't suppose that this will result in a ludicrously contrived way for Judai to win, do you? Ha ha ha, perish the thought, a contrived win for Judai? Never! Judai's turn, he draws Neos, but what a shame, he can't summon him this turn, making this a dead draw. Blah blah blah, Judai and Edo realize that there's no point in summoning weak monsters, since Dark God can't attack directly. Also, Judai's voice is still really annoying. Judai ends his turn without doing anything, and Mizuchi mocks his efforts to try and exploit Dark God's limitations. So she activates her permanent trap card Shikigami Return; during the end phase of your opponent's turn, if they did not summon a monster, special summon a Shikigami token to their side of the field in defense position. Mizuchi attacks, boom goes Shikigami, and now Judai and Edo are down to 900 life points.
Oh dear god Judai, I want to punch you so fucking much I'll tear open a hole into the punch dimension to do so. WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU JUDAI, HAVE YOU NO FUCKING CONCEPT OF WHAT IS AT STAKE HERE? HAVE YOU NO FUCKING CONCEPT THAT YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE SAVING YOUR FRIENDS, NOT GAWKING AT STUPID MONSTERS? NO, OF COURSE YOU DON'T, BECAUSE THAT WOULDN'T BE FUN, NOW WOULD IT YOU PRICK! Honestly, there is a world of difference between keeping a positive attitude, and being a fucking prick. Judai, is a fucking prick.
Blah blah blah, WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU PLAYING THAT TRACK, IT DOESN'T EVEN MAKE THE LEAST BIT OF SENSE YOU TWITS! AND THEY STRETCH IT OUT, OH DEAR GOD WHEN IS IT GOING TO END? Oh, and Edo special summons two Double Guy tokens, thanks to Double Guy's effect. Blah blah blah, Edo is obsessed with his D-Heroes, and then he sacrifices one of the tokens to summon Dash Guy, whose effect allows him to sacrifice the other token to increase its attack power by 1000, to 3100, 100 greater than the Dark God. Judai points out the obvious, Edo attacks, huge boom, Mizuchi takes 100 damage, but as it turns out, Dark God can't be destroyed in battle. And after the battle phase is over, Dash Guy switches to defense position. Edo ends his turn and is convinced that they're destined to lose, and Dash Guy is destroyed for 700 damage, which means that if Judai doesn't win on his next turn, they lose. Blah blah blah, Judai is so great, we fucking get it, and suddenly Winged Kuriboh comes out. It points to Edo, and...Dash Guy is standing next to him? Does Judai really need a spirit's help to remember that Dash Guy was on the field last turn? Fuck, I don't even know anymore. Blah blah blah, everyone's depending on Judai, which in a sane universe would mean everyone's fucked, but this is GX.
EYECATCH!
Judai's turn, and he's drawn the sixth and final Hippy Space Animal, Black Panther. Really? Black Panther? You're really going to go there? Also, it apparently feels the need to spell out to Judai how to win. Fuck, fuck, fuck. Anyway, it turns out that when Dash Guy is in the grave, once per duel you can special summon a monster you've just drawn, so he special summons Black Panther onto the field. Then he activates Black Panther's effect; once per turn he can copy another monster's name and effect until the end phase, so he copies Dark God's name and effect, which conveniently enough allows Judai to use the Mirror Summoning card to special summon a whole mess of tokens onto the field. Wow, so that's the contrivance that the writers were going for; I knew they could do something incredibly epically stupid.
Seriously, compare this, to Yuugi exploiting the loophole in Malik's infinite-card combo in his duel against the Silent Puppet, there is a huge world of difference between them. Anyway, Judai sacrifices two of the tokens to summon Neos, and then does Contact Fusion to bring out Black Neos; if he starts talking in a Jive Turkey accent, I'm leaving. And what is Black Neos's effect? Why, Judai picks a monster on the field, and negates its effect, how quaint. So Judai sicks one of his Dark God Tokens after the original, they both blow up, and apparently this takes out all the other tokens. Then Judai attacks directly with Black Neos, winning the duel. Woo. Oh, and now Shou and Kenzan are back to normal. Woop-di-do.
Blah blah blah, for the fifty millionth time Judai is so great, blah blah blah, and now Mizuchi asks that Judai and Edo save her brother; yes, that's right, we're just going to straight up rip-off of Battle City and Isis Ishtar, instead risking doing something vaguely interesting. Okay, there's just a lot of talking here, so I'm just going to go off the summary; Takuma is two-faced and wants to destroy the world. When they were young, their ability to see the future drove people away from them for...some reason, and this gave them a super-special awesome brother-sister bond unlike any other...UNTIL ONE DAY! A duelist arrived, wanting his fortune told, and he showed Takuma a card. The card, by the way, is glowing bright white, and I'm not sure if this is to represent that Mizuchi didn't get a good look at it, or if its meant to be taken literally; I certainly wouldn't put it past this show for it to be taken literally. Mizuchi tried to get Takuma to get rid of the card, but no dice. Also, it was apparently a Hero card, though how Mizuchi can remember that but not the actual name of a card, is just one plot hole out of a million. This of course gets Edo's attention, as it means that Saiou had to have known all along the identity of the man who murdered Edo's father. Edo demands to know where Saiou's keeping the card, but according to Mizuchi, it went missing some time ago. BECAUSE THAT MAKES SENSE!!!
Oh, and it would seem that Mizuchi was a load bearing boss, because the whole virtual reality place is collapsing for no particular reason. Blah blah blah, Mizuchi will be staying behind, as apparently at some point she bonded her soul to the computer or some shit like that, I don't even know anymore, and she begs Judai and Edo to stop her brother from destroying the world. They accept, and they leave. They're back outside, and Shou is such a rude fucking prick to Misawa that I honestly wish he'd been left behind. Oh, and apparently the four elemental idiots are also okay. Whatever, it's not like anyone in the audience or the writing staff gave a fuck about them. Blah blah blah, Sugoroku says something about Seto saving Mizuchi, and so the idiot patrol takes off. Oh, also at some point Sugoroku got his bandanna back.
Saiou is wondering why Mizuchi hasn't contacted him yet about who's supposed to change his destiny, and then he sees Judai and Edo pass him by on the road, which for some reason makes him really mad. I honestly do not understand, if Mizuchi was supposed to test those twits, why would he be surprised about them being alive and well? But hey, none of this plot ever made sense to begin with, so why should it start now. And now Saiou is glowing, and is saying bad things about Judai and Edo. Woo. Oh hey, end of episode.
NEXT TIME! Instead of going after Saiou, Judai instead duels a walking Alice-in-Wonderland reference. Because he is an idiot. EPISODE TITLE, ALICE OF DESPERATE LAND. Card of the Week is Dark God.
Now, a few words about the context of this entire, insipid mini-arc. See, originally, it was going to be a movie! Kazuki Takahashi had the notion for Judai and the others to go to Domino City and meet up with Yuugi and the others, and Saiou would have just been a student with a Tarot themed deck. Obviously, that fell through, but this crop of writers felt just fine about cannibalizing this movie idea to create this mini-arc. And the other thing to bring up, is that the reason why Demiurge Ema and Dark God looked so stupid and out of place, was because they were winners of some stupid create-a-card contest, and so they got shoved in to the show. So there you go, the backstory to why the past five episodes were an even bigger waste of time than usual.
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no subject
Date: 2010-09-30 12:24 am (UTC)...Um. This Mizuchi is a reflection of some sort, right? Because her clothing appears to be backwards. Oh, yes, the other Mizuchi's clothes appear correct.
Somehow, Kenzan and Shou fail to be amusing.
The only thing in Yuugiou which should be called the 'dark god' in any way is Zorc, and I think he gave that title to himself.
I don't think you've been missing anything by watching the episodes before without subtitles. ...Was this subtitled? The version of 79 I found is raw.
Thank you for reminding me of Battle City, and of a far more interesting antagonist. *tries to comfort self with memories*
All this talk about changing Saiou's fate... It's just word-dropping because 'unmei' sounds impressive. But I'm still not sure what their fate is, so it ends up failing.
Only Juudai would need a hallucinatory puffball to help him find a strategy.
That made...no sense. Whatsoever. It wouldn't have made much less sense if I'd watched it in, I don't know, Russian. And the next episode is pointless filler in the middle of a supposedly serious arc. Surprise, surprise.
no subject
Date: 2010-09-30 03:28 am (UTC)Yeah, she's got that whole mirror thing going on. Doesn't really mean much, to be honest.
The day that Shou and Kenzan manage to amuse, is the day the world ends.
I just...it is so creatively bankrupt! How do you do that?
Raw episode on my half too, and no, I didn't really miss anything. It's just mildly inconvenient to have to look at a summary, that's all.
MEMORIES! Yes, because it is exactly at this point that Yuugi has risked his life to save Jounouchi. You will never, ever, EVER see Judai make that kind of sacrifice. Trust me on this.
Apparently, it is to destroy the world, because a card told him to...or, something.
Really, he's just so goddamn "special". And yes, I mean that in the mean and offensive fashion.
It is ludicrously convoluted, 90% of what happens fails to meaningfully contribute to what little plot there is, and despite the fact that this should be all that Judai needs to kick his ass into high gear, it doesn't. Honestly, what is this, I don't even.